There is an unwritten universal law, that when one area of your life is going satisfyingly well, another seems to come crashing down.
It’s a rarity that I meet a person who tells me that all areas of their life are working in perfect harmony. In fact, I’ve yet to meet a person who is free from suffering or desire. Nothing is static, it’s just Nature’s way. Rivers flow. Night follows day. Seasons change. There is a continual cycle of birth, death, rebirth, it’s unrealistic to expect life to stand still.
Most of the time the small twists and turns of life pass us by. We accept the shifting of seasons, the ebb and flow of relationships; the ups and downs of our working lives. But sometimes you find yourself in a place where a huge change beckons. Instead of watching the river meander by, you’re standing at the top of a vast cliff staring at the deep ocean below. It’s so scary that it takes your breath away.
When life forces you to Pause
Nearly all of us have those moments when life suddenly spins around on its axis leaving us shocked to the core.
You could walk into work, thinking it’s just another day, and find you’ve been made redundant, that you have no work, no means of paying your mortgage, your bills. The fear of homelessness, of worthlessness, of failure, hits you hard.
Then again, you could walk into the doctor’s expecting to be told you need to keep off the burgers, or up the exercise, or that maybe you need a course of antibiotics. Or that your child has some simple silly illness. But then you’re sitting and listening to words from your worst nightmares – cancer, tumour, heart disease, operation, inoperable, hospital… In fact, you stop listening because your heart is beating so fast and your mind has gone so numb. And it’s hard not to think about pain, about fear, about loss, about death.
Or you pick up the buzzing mobile and see the text that is clearly not intended for you. Or you sit, weary and tired, after yet another argument, another fight. Or maybe you sit, literally bruised and battered, the promises of ‘never again’ having been broken yet once more. You know it’s over. Even if there is no big drama, no big battle, the end of a relationship can feel like a splitting of your soul. Where there were once two, there will be one. Even if there is some relief, there is also worry – how to cope, how to move forward with dignity, how to live a life alone, how to protect the children, how to preserve your own heart.
The Enforced Pause
I call these times when life comes crashing down, enforced pauses. Sometimes they are painful, literally heart-breaking events. Other times they are a quiet resignation, a moment when you reach your own conclusion, knowing that your life simply isn’t working the way it is. You sense there is something else out there, something bigger (or maybe smaller, or simpler), something that will make your soul sing, your heart smile, your feet dance. But, just because it is desired, it doesn’t make it any the less scary.
Life is leading you
When you are faced with big change, it is easy to lose hope and think that everything is broken.
But what if the reality is that nothing is broken? I know amidst the turbulence, fear, and anxiety this can be hard to believe; as you struggle to breathe and feel scared, it’s hard to hold onto the idea that life is leading you where you need to be. I understand that it’s a place you cannot imagine in that moment, as you try desperately to control the events of your life to keep it all from crashing down.
Come and rest your weary soul
If you are facing a turbulent transition or a seismic shift in your life right now (or simply know you have some change coming), come and rest with me at the Deep Pause and allow yourself space to breathe and time to think. During this five-day retreat, I will be right alongside you supporting you to connect with your feelings, tune into your intuition and guide your thinking so you find ways of being and acting that will help you navigate this change. For more than a decade, I have coached countless people as they make big life changes and I’m here to help you too.
If you are ready to pause and transform your world, book your place at the Deep Pause today.